You Paired Me With Who?: Female VolknerxShipping
by LavanderSkye
Summary: Female Volkner's reactions to shippings. Idea borrowed from Midori12 (with their permission of course)


So I was reading a fanfic by Midori12 where certain Pokémon characters were reacting to shipping and, with their permission, here is female Volkner's reactions!

• • • • •

Relationships? I'm already in one right now but apparently people "ship" (whatever the hell that means) me with other people. I'm bored as fuck and am currently banned from renovating my gym so I guess I'll take a look...

• **AlexandrianShipping:** Volkner x Jasmine

Okay, first off, I am 100% straight, but Jasmine is a really sweet girl. A little shy though. I always see her at the beach in Sunyshore and she's always talking to some trainer. Not sure why she's always hanging around here though...

• **AmarilloShipping:** Volkner x Jolteon

Now why the hell would I date a Pokémon?! I mean Jolteons pretty cool and all, but seriously!?

• **BashouShipping: **Volkner x Cyrus

I don't think he has any feelings and can in no way show any form of affection

• **BeaconShipping:** Volkner x Dawn

Dawns okay. I was really impressed when she became Champion.

• **CableShipping:** Volkner x Riley

Ooh I quite like this one...

• **CeaseToneBeamShipping:** Volkner x Slowbro

Who keeps suggesting all these Pokémon pairings?!

• **ChargeParticleShipping:** Volkner x Barry

Nah, he's too cocky for my tastes.

• **CircuitShipping:** Volkner x Lucian

Lucian's boring, plus I have a feeling he's into some really weird shit...

• **DiscontentShipping:** Volkner x Marley

I don't really know her considering I've only talked to her like once so I don't have an opinion on this one

• **DisrespectShipping:** Volkner x Paul

No. Never in a million fucking years. That kid was so disrespectful that it took a whole lot of willpower to keep me from having my Luxray zap him...

• **DormitoryShipping**: Volkner x Rotom

Isn't it like a sin to get together with Pokémon? I'll have to look that up

• **ElectricEliteShipping:** Volkner x Cynthia

Cynthia is one of my good female friends, but she can be really intimidating, even more then me some times.

• **ElectricGuitarShipping:** Volkner x Roxie

Flint dragged me to one of her concerts and honestly, she kinda freaked me out.

• **ElectricHeaterShipping:** Volkner x Buck

Hahahahaha no.

• **ElectrifyingShipping:** Volkner x Zapdos

Seriously, how would you even have...um, you know what with it?!

• **ElectrocutedShipping:** Volkner x Fantina

I have a really hard time understanding her half the time. Plus Ghost-type Pokémon kinda freak me out...

• **ElectroShipping:** Volkner x Lt. Surge

No. That guy is an ASSHOLE. I met him once at a party and I can say from firsthand experiences that he's a pervert. Plus he would probably crush me, in case you haven't noticed, he's fucking HUGE!

• **EnergyShipping:** Volkner x Roark

When I first met Roark he asked me if I wanted to go out sometime and I told him I wasn't gay. Also the fact that I was almost his stepmom doesn't really help there. Maybe if I were a guy though...

• **ExhallenShipping:** Volkner x Luxray

I love my Luxray but seriously guys, enough with the Pokémon pairings!

• **ExPikaShipping:** Volkner x Pikachu

...

• **FirecrackerShipping:** Volkner x Maylene

Once she tried to break my arm because I told her I didn't like cinnamon gum...

• **FrazzleShipping:** Volkner x Crasher Wake

Water and Electricity don't really mix. He's a good guy though.

• **GalvanicShipping:** Volkner x Byron

Been there, done that (multiple times)

• **IgnitionShipping:** Volkner x Flint

Flints my best friend. I mean sure once or twice we've gotten wasted and made out, but it's never gotten farther then that.

Okay maybe once...

• **LightningboltShipping:** Volkner x Ash

He's an okay kid, little too energetic for my tastes though

• **LightningbugShipping:** Volkner x Aaron

I've thought about it a few times but Bug-types gross me out and he's kinda obsessed with them so...

• **LucozadeShipping:** Volkner x Mira

...I'm not a pedophile guys

• **MagneticShipping:** Volkner x Magneton

I'm refusing to respond to these

• **ManaShipping:** Volkner x Gardenia

Gardenia's a cool person to spend time with, but I'm straight

**McDonaldsShipping:** Volkner, Flint x Buck

Guys, that's fucking incest! I could go to hell for that!

**MinatoShipping:** Volkner x Ninetales

Flipping you guys the bird right now

• **SenirasuShipping:** Volkner x Candice

Candice and I get along okay, but personally she talks too much and is too perky. She throws pretty good parties though

• **ShockingShipping:** Volkner x Elesa

I've never met her but I know that she's an Electric-type gym leader too so we might get along well. Not interested in a relationship though.

• **StokeShipping:** Volkner x Lucas

I think I'll pass thank you very much

• **ThroughBeingCoolShipping:** Volkner x Looker

...maybe. Just maybe. Depends on how wasted I am. Like if I can still walk to my car then no.

• **VoltageShipping:** Volkner x Manectric

...

• **ZapPlateShipping:** Volkner x Arceus

Not even the god of Pokémon could get me to hook up with a Pokémon. I don't feel like going to hell...

• **ZapShipping: **Volkner x Pachirisu

...fuck you guys.

• • • • •

Final Thoughts:

Well this certainly kept me entertained, I must say. I'll have to show these to Flint I think he'd enjoy them.

• • • • •

Volkner's been bored lately so I figured this'll distract her from blacking out Sunyshore again. Anywho, check out Midori12's story for the male Volkner's side of this as well as other character's, and check out their other stories too!


End file.
